Emotional Health & Self-Esteem in Children with SLD: Protecting the Mind Behind the Marks
A child with dyslexia, ADHD or dysgraphia does not just struggle with reading or writing. They struggle with constant comparison, classroom humiliation, poor grades, teacher complaints, and relatives asking, “Itna bada ho gaya, abhi tak likhna nahi aaya?”
Slowly, it is no longer just a learning difficulty — it becomes a self-worth problem.
They start believing:
“I am dumb.”
“I always make mistakes.”
“No one understands me.”
“Why should I go to school?”
This is why mental health support is as important as academic support in children with learning disabilities.
💔 How Emotional Problems Develop in These Children
| Situation | Child’s Thought | Emotional Result |
|---|---|---|
| Constant scolding for spelling errors | “No matter what I do, it’s wrong.” | Helplessness, low confidence |
| Comparison with siblings/toppers | “I am not good enough.” | Shame, jealousy |
| Teachers saying “Careless, lazy, inattentive” | “I am the problem.” | Self-blame |
| Failing despite effort | “Why try when I always fail?” | Loss of motivation |
| Bullying by classmates | “Everyone thinks I’m stupid.” | Social withdrawal |
⚠️ Psychological Issues Seen in SLD & ADHD Kids
✔ Low self-esteem
✔ School refusal or exam panic
✔ Anger issues, crying easily
✔ Anxiety / Panic attacks
✔ Depression (especially in teenagers)
✔ Aggression, defiance (sometimes labelled as ODD/CD)
✔ Addiction to screens/gaming as escape
✔ Self-harm or suicidal thoughts (in long untreated cases)
Important: Children rarely say “I am depressed.” Instead, they say: “I don’t want to go to school.” “Mummy, mujhe mar jaana hai.” “I hate studies.”
🌱 How to Build Confidence and Emotional Strength
✅ 1. Praise Effort, Not Marks
Instead of: “Why only 60? Sharma ji ka beta got 90.”
Say: “You worked hard. I’m proud of the progress you made.”
✅ 2. Highlight the Child’s Strengths
Every child with SLD has a talent — drawing, memory, music, Legos, sports, storytelling, empathy.
Let them shine somewhere — not just in tests.
✅ 3. Use the “Growth Mindset” Approach
Teach them:
✔ “Mistakes mean you’re learning.”
✔ “Your brain grows when you try — not when you’re right.”
✔ Effort > Accuracy.
✅ 4. Reduce Shame at Home
🚫 Stop sarcasm: “Kitni baar bolu likhne ko?”
🚫 Stop public humiliation in front of guests, relatives, teachers
✅ Be their safe space, not another exam hall
🎭 Counselling & Therapy – When to Seek Help
| Emotional Sign | Suggested Help |
|---|---|
| School refusal, constant crying | Child counselling / CBT |
| Extreme fear of exams | Relaxation training, exposure therapy |
| Anger outbursts, aggression | Behaviour therapy, parent management training |
| Low self-esteem, “I am useless” | Cognitive restructuring + self-worth therapy |
| ADHD + SLD + anger | Combined medication + counselling |
| Teen depression, self-harm thoughts | Urgent psychiatric support |
Creative therapies like art therapy, music therapy, storytelling therapy help non-verbal emotional expression.
🧠 What Teachers Can Do (Emotionally Safe Classrooms)
✔ Don’t force child to read aloud if they’re struggling
✔ Avoid calling them “lazy, careless, distraction”
✔ Give extra time without making it obvious
✔ Use group activities so they don’t feel isolated
✔ Give them responsibilities — class plant care, library duty — to build confidence
👪 Parents, You Are the First Therapist
✅ Believe the child – they are trying
✅ Focus on progress, not perfection
✅ Protect them from toxic relatives/teachers
✅ Show physical affection — hug them often
✅ Use calm tone, not threats or guilt
✅ Say: “Marks do not define you. You are more than a report card.”
🌟 Remember This…
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Dyslexia or ADHD does not break a child — shame and comparison do.
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Every Einstein was probably called slow at some point.
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Every Thomas Edison was told he couldn’t learn.
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Your belief in your child is often the first medicine they receive.
👨⚕️ About the Author
Dr. Srinivas Rajkumar T
MD (AIIMS, New Delhi), DNB Psychiatry
Consultant – Child, Adolescent & Family Psychiatry
Mind & Memory Clinic – Apollo Clinic
(Opp. Phoenix MarketCity), Velachery, Chennai – 600042
📞 +91-8595155808 | 🌐 www.srinivasaiims.com